I’ll warn you right now, I talk a LOT about doodie.  Dog doodie by way of human doodie.  And, genies.  Diaper Genies, blue cartoon genies, and my favorite kind of genie, the “I Dream Of Genie.”

I also continue the saga of the supposed rebirth of my acting career.  Maybe it’s not acting, maybe it’s just my career as “all in.”  We’ll see.  I think I’ve finally gotten to a point where I want to fail.  Because, you can’t fail unless you’re trying.  And, you can’t succeed unless you’re trying too.

Premium version: Pretty long
Free version: To come…

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On this edition of the podcast, I pick up where we left off last time.  I am making costumes (plural!) for my daughter’s appearance in Charlotte’s Web, unknowingly auditioning for voice over jobs, and buying a new car that ISN’T EVEN ON THE LOT.

Before I even got a chance to drive the new car, I came to a fork in the road.  I needed to decide, left or right.  ACTIVELY decide.  Decide and then drive, baby, drive.

Premium Edition: An hour, seven minutes

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My son Hudson joins me in Studio G to discuss art school summer camp, channel surfing, buying and naming a dog, the Karate Kid movies and finally getting a chance to use a payphone*…

Premium version: Fifty-four minutes

*a “payphone” is a sort of steam-punk device where one can make a phone call by inserting a coin into a metal box.  The coin falls inside the box, tripping a series of levers that activate a mechanism that connects to an ancient wired telecommunication system.  The user puts a heavy molded plastic “receiver” to their head.  Sound waves are sent to the user’s ear via a series of color-coded wires that connect directly from the phone system to a speaker housed in the receiver.  Amazing, isn’t it?  When we first saw one handing in the halls of OTIS (art college) we assumed it was someone’s senior project left on display.  It was only when Hudson touched it that I remembered that the country used to be littered with payphones, most of which you would never dare let an eleven year old touch without immediately rushing him to the nearest men’s room/hospital.

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I am joined in Studio G by very special guests Brian Ibbott and Tina Ibbott from the legendary Coverville podcast.  Brian’s podcast was one of the first I ever listened to and was certainly one of the handful that convinced me that I needed to start this show.

Now, I’ll forewarn you now, we spend much of the hour and fifteen minutes we talked geeking out on music (big shock there).  Brian and I have very similar taste in music, and I don’t get much time with adults, let alone adults that know more about the music I love than I do.  So, I will apologize now for this not exactly being a prototypical Bitterest Pill show.  Deal.

We do, however, talk about car breakdowns, child molestation, Federal Air Marshals and peeing in public.

Premium Edition: One hour, eighteen minutes
Free Edition: Twenty-seven minutes

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This episode is a strange hodge-podge of meaningless anetdotes.  So, what else is new?

After 15 years or more of procrastinating, I’m trying (again) to get a voice over reel together.  We’ll see if I survive working with Melissa to record some voice overs for a presentation she’s working on.  I’m reminded, yet again, of Orson Welles.  “If you can start a sentence with the word ‘in’ and emphasize it, I’ll…” Oh, you know the rest…

I saw a couple I am on “hi” basis with saying goodbye to each other the other morning.  Their version of “see you later, honey” is she stomps to her car and gets in and he kicks the door in.  Great.  I almost had to hit him over the head with a box of tampons.

There was a girl selling lemonade in our neighborhood.  Well, a 25 year-old woman, actually.  Selling lemonade by the martini glass, while wearing a bikini.

And, lastly…I think I stalked a girl for a mile while trying to go pick up my car.  I wasn’t starking her, by the way.  I didn’t know anything about her.  But, her butt said “PINK.”

Premium edition: One hour, four minutes
Free edition: 24 min.

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I had a brainstorm while recording this show: The Dan Klass New Media Summer Camp!  You give me lots of money and I’ll teach your kids podcasting next summer!  Whadda ya say!  Registration for Summer 2011 starts soon!  Don’t be left out!

We went to the annual adopt-a-doggie day event at Westchester Park.  We saw lots of dogs and a couple of “celebrities.’  I have to say this: Denise Richards, in real life, looks like she was created by Stan Lee.

To learn how to keep your dog safe and sound, check out Melanie Monteiro’s “Safe Dog Handbook” book and many instructional videos.

We went to the cultural fair held at the kids’ school.  And so did our “rainbow cookies.”  Eventually.

Premium Version: An hour, ten
Free Version: 28.5 minutes

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