I’ve been nostalgic as usual, leading up to my next high school class reunion. I needn’t get all worked up since I’m apparently gonna miss the reunion anyway because it’s the same day as my parents 50th wedding anniversary. Oops. That takes the pressure off to finally do something with my life before the 4th of July weekend. Maybe I have until July 4th, 2022. I’ll probably be dead by then. Remember me fondly.
Apparently I have trouble saying “I’m sorry” to my wife. I think it has something to do with my retreating inward when things go wrong. That, or I am simply an a**hole. I’m working on it…
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Here’s a piece of advice, you need to react to whatever the situation is in a manner that is way over the top. If you start yelling and screaming like something out of the Exorcist, your wife will be so taken back that she’ll be speechless.
The other option is to start barking out orders and go into attack mode. This is 2012, Men have been liberated.
The other option is to say what my grandmother use to say F___ IT.
Hi Dan
I completely agree with you, there is no way you should have apologised in that situation. As I have mentioned before, your wife appears to have emasculated you because she sees herself in the breadwinner/provider role and she probably also feels a lot of stress about money (BMW!!) so she is expressing this by getting on your back 24/7 and treating you like a child.
I agree with Fred – anti-bully tactic number 1 – attack!!
Ok – now it is time for a woman to weigh in. NO WAY should she expect you to apologize. If I felt the need to elicit an apology in every situation I dare say I would not be sitting here married still looking down the barrel of my 20 yr anniversary. Also, the kitchen is very clearly your domain and she should not shove you out of the way like a child who cannot handle a clean-up. I understand being stressed – it is my constant mode. However, you are not an underling at work. You are her husband worthy of respect or at least worthy of a little confidence in your abilities. Dear Melissa – I am sure you are a wonderful lady. However, if I lived with you I fear I would be seeking therapy also. Also, why does the creamer need to be on the counter anyway? Make your coffee, pour your coffee, get creamer out of the refrigerator, add to coffee, back to fridge – DONE. Just saying.
I have to confess I don’t know what a creamer is! Here, I would add milk to my coffee, maybe occasionally whisk it up for latte etc. Are you saying you take cream with coffee?
You know how weird and fussy us Americans are Wayne! In the land of Starbucks we have “coffee creamers” that are flavored. It is a hybrid milk/cream I think. I believe Dan said Melissa’s is fat free (like mine) hazlenut ( I like French Vanilla). No plain cup of coffee for us fussy gals.I take mine out of the refrigerator right after I pour my coffee, add it and than back in the fridge it goes. No dressing down of my husband needed.
Just hope ‘Saying sorry’ to your wife will not be a problem for you at all. We women would appreciate men to be humble, especially when they made mistakes. It wouldn’t actually take a lot before we give in.
for people who have high pride and ego sorry would be the hardest word. Since a lot of people tend not to look at the circumstances and the things that would happen after they will admit there mistakes. And a lot of people would not care as long as there pride would not be match. In fact saying sorry is not just for the sake of saying it. You need to sincerely say it and accept you mistakes.
Diggin’ the new outro rhythm track Dan!
If it was me I would have apologized. It was technically her dairy creamer since you don’t get much use out of it and that you both would have shared the cleaning up and it was something extra that she didn’t have to do before the accident. But I’m pretty quick to apologize but I don’t think that an apology should be expected from my partner. Maybe for the backyard thing, but not for the creamer.